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I asked the trees to heal me
I asked the rain
to sow seeds of peace in my heart
and explained my situation
to the clink of wineglasses,
bottles of beer, and mugs of coffee
as a price to pay for their company
so I wouldn’t be alone.
I am wondering whether I am appealing enough
for clarity of mind to want to sit with me
if only for a moment.

I told the kois,
I didn’t want this feeling anymore.
I told the steam from the baking earth,
I couldn’t stand to be vulnerable
in the palms of your hands anymore.

But they told me it’s too soon
to want to be free
of the restless hummingbirds
nesting in my soul.
They bid me have patience
because it’s intuition’s show
and she’s not done yet
speaking her lines
They told me with beseeching eyes
to pay attention
They said it’s important
so I swallowed my tears
and tried to sit upright on my chair

This place is a little less familiar
just because you and I have talked about it,
the rebellious defiance I’ve celebrated
for insisting to call home
a Paradise I’m half a success short
of being beautiful enough to belong
turning mainstream and conservative to me.
The reflection of the geometry of buildings
each vying for attention, for its place
against the dark clouds
are distended and distorted
by monochromatic puddles of rainwater
that refuse to separate
the handsome white-clad picture of you
from my happiness

and I realized my escape is now my hunter

it tells me it wants you